Cultural Curiosity

Day two of our 35 day adventure began at the zoo. It was a difficult start as I realized the importance of bank communication prior to my departure. I HAD DONE NONE. My card was declined and I spend the rest of the day worrying that my trip would have to be kept to the amount of cash in my purse.

The zoo only reinforced my need to have my tubes tied as soon as I return home. This place is beautiful, magical, and relaxing until it comes to any outing at a point of interest. There are school kids EVERYWHERE. They are loud, rude, and wear stupid brightly colored uniforms. I HATE them! I will never have them! I spend a majority of the day zoning them out and yelling "excuse you" when they would bump into us.

On a more pleasant note the zoo was beautiful! They've put a lot of time into the landscaping, layout, and care of this facility. The animals were amazing and other then the kids it wasn't much different than an American zoo.

After the zoo we went to Central Market. As we attempted to find the correct bus we accidentally walked all the way to the market. This open air market was full of fresh fruit and vegetables. We challenged each other to find one fruit we'd never tried before. We only ended up with one called a golden kiwi. It tasted like a pear and kiwi had a random one night stand from which the golden kiwi was born.

As we left the market we ended up in China/Japanese/Thai/Asian looking people town. By this time we were starving and looking for ANYTHING to eat. Oh there was plenty to eat alright, none of it looked edible.

On our 3rd day of our 35 day adventure we FINALLY slept in. We've been having a horrible time adjusting to the time change. We woke around noon and had Roger drop us at the South Australian Museum. They have the largest collection of Aboriginal artifacts in the world. Three floors of boomerangs, baskets, and weapons. They must have had a lot of time on their hands! It was breath taking. There were all sorts of exhibits from animals to marine life, rocks to.... well more rocks! It took us four hours to navigate this gigantic museum.

At last we took the bus home. The bus driver was very friendly and didn't charge us anything. I think he felt bad for our dumb asses. Of course once we got off the right bus stop we turned the wrong way to walk home. Eventually we found a pay phone to call Roger. He came and showed us the way! I can't imagine doing this without them. We would be so lost!

Describing Down Under!

I generally have horrible traveling luck. I'm not being dramatic. Anything that could possibly go wrong generally does. Doesn't matter if I fly or drive. This trip however was different. Only one plane delay due to 50 mph winds (which is essentially nothing to this Wyoming girl). And... ONE SCREAMING BABY. I called my mother when I landed in LAX and told her to set up my tube tying surgery for the day I get back!

Traveling for thirty something hours straight really wears on you. I felt postal as we waited for our last plane to deboard. Finally we had arrived. Chris and Roger picked us up from the airport and took us to their beautiful home.

We showered which was probably the most amazing shower of my life even though it was only allowed to be three minutes. They are on very strict water restrictions here.

We went down to the jetty (a pier or worf in America). There were men fishing off of it so we stood and watched a while. The man we watched the longest would catch a fish, tell us it was to small, then hurl it back in the water so hard it knocked one unconscious. Poor little puffer fish. It was perfect. The ocean was beautiful and the sand a bright white.

We went to pick up my nana (great grandmother) she is 85. I picked fresh lemons from her garden. We finally got back to Chris and Roger's. They told us that every night at 5 o'clock we will have happy hour and watch Antique Road Show. AAHHHH this trip is going to be rough! Chris made us the most amazing dinner of garlic shrimp and rice, tempura fried vegetables, and salad. Dinner was amazing and so was the company.

I've finally reached the heaven I've always dreamt of. This place is magic and the energy amazing. I can't wait to see the adventures that await this red head and her little brunette pal!

Surreal Situations

I've awoke every morning for the last week with a knot is my stomach and a pounding heart. Initially I believed it to be the vodka Red Bull consumed the nights before in celebration of finishing yet another degree. However, I've realized this not to be the cause of discomfort.

I've realized it's anxiety. You see my mother's family is all from Australia. It's tradition in the native culture there to do what is called a walkabout. This is essentially a spiritual journey into the unknown for a long period of time. My grandfather took his when he was extremely young and never returned to what I would call a normal life until he married my grandmother. My mother took hers when she was 18 and said she "came back a whole new women." Well my walkabout is approaching and I too will experience the spiritual journey that has changed so many in my family.

So why the anxiety I ask myself. I'm incredibly excited for this adventure. But I haven't been able to determine the source of said anxiety until this morning. I woke this morning with the same feelings that I've awaken with all week. As I tossed and turned I finally was set as ease when my eyes landed upon the calming entity lying next to me. The anxiety was not stemming from my bad planning, unpacked suitcases, or lack of Australian knowledge. It was my heart aching for the one I love. My world, my everything, my muse!

The hearts a work of art difficult to understand. I spend way too much time attempting to understand exactly what it's telling my head. My eyes see what's happening, my brain interprets the message, and delivers to my heart which should decipher my feelings in relation to the image. Well I think the messenger has a flat tire or got way to hammered last night to be working today! My heart is broken. Although my walkabout is only 5 weeks long my heart already aches for the man I know I'll miss most. I finally understand the saying "you complete me." He does complete me. He's the glasses that fix my blurred vision, the caffeine that sharpens my brain, and the sober messenger delivering ease to my pounding heart.

When it comes to my anxiety I simply need to retreat to the serenity that continues to inspire me everyday of my life. My Muse!

After a while what you thought was temporary becomes real! The relationships you thought would never change do! You eventually start to build your own life! They eventually stop missing you! But I still live for their dreams... Attempting always to accomplish what I wanted initially and what they push for now.... I could have chosen the "normal" path.... Stayed in my little home town, got a husband, had kids..... Maybe then they'd be proud! Maybe then they'd be excited to see me......

I've realized after five years the people who used to care still do....... However, emotions have changed.... They've become so distant and I've become a waste of their income! This story is sad but true.... Every story ends with a tale of thieves and a rescued princess.

I'm happy here! I love my life and I love the place I live.... I love that I'm the first person in my family to have an undergraduate degree. Phone calls consist of "when are you moving home" instead of how are you. I'm not moving home. I pray daily I'm not shunned for that. I've realized I've been away to long to turn back the clock... I never want to be that person again.... I have the most amazing family and I'm so grateful for all the inspiration and support I've received in the last five years, throughout my life. I do now, for the first time since I left home realize that those family bonds will never be the same. Relationships take effort from both sides to maintain. It's the strangest thing how the one aunt you've lived the furthest away from the majority of your life becomes your strongest ally. She gets you, because she was once you. I've begun the process of building my own family. Or rather, they have began the process of unifying themselves. They have been doing it for years, without my recognition. Team Smash-as they are called are thicker than thieves and stronger then blood. I wouldn't trade them for all the lemons in the world!

Sincerely,
Smash

Smash Goes to Vegas!

I admire my mothers spontaneity. She loves to travel and isn't much of a planner! She'll call me a week before her travels, to tell me she's leaving. Her travels always end in warm weather, tan toes, and a smile from ear to ear. What an amazing life she lives! I envy her. I envy her sense of self! This month my mother decided I would be part of her fun!! Fun does not even begin to explain what happened in Las Vegas!

Las Vegas is a city built around sin and trust me it's hard not to submit to the will of LV's evil. I've seen this town turn people crazy. Bring out demons not previously witnessed in souls I thought so pure. This dessert hell hole in the middle of Nevada has become a Mecca for Sinners. Humans are drawn into its God like grip, via glass walled sky scapers and lights so bright they are seen from space. Once Sin City has you in its grasps you are catapulted into a realm of chaos in which you can't escape until your body literally gives up on the idea of recovery. You will survive I promise!

I went to Vegas to celebrate my twenty third birthday! In anticipation of the hangover to come I boarded the plane and quickly found my seat. The 9:30 am flight was full of middle aged vacationers praying for the time of their lives. We all started drinking. The plane turned into a party flight worse then a college packed flight to Cabo I once experienced in 05'. I wanted to scream I was so excited! Two hours and I would be with my parents, two of their friends, and my friend SWAT. Swat was there to celebrate her 21st birthday. Throwing up in anticipation or from the booze I exited the plane. I met my limo driver at baggage claim and proceeded to the Gold limo waiting for solely me. I love the drivers in Vegas they all have such unique stories! My driver immediately began discussing her upbringing in Vegas with me. Let's just say the 20 minute ride was filled with talk of cocaine, meth, drinking, and how she prays to never have a daughter like her! It made me smile thinking of how many intimate details this beautiful blond was sharing with me.

Welcome to Las Vegas, the door man said, as he snatched my bag and lead me to check in. This is where the adventure began.

Introducing Smash!

I'm a 22 year old girl/women (this has yet to be determined by me or others). I have always been a firm believer in act your shoe size, not your age. In my case that makes me eight and I still have the scares to prove it. I was born and raised in a lovely municipality called Casper. If you've ever been to Casper you probably wouldn't describe this brownish, desolate, windy Wyoming town as lovely. However, I do and I mean lovely in the sense that it was a great place to grow up, not a place to vacation (you hear that Greenies, stay the F out).

I had what I would consider a "normal" childhood and by "normal" I mean incredibly eccentric. I was raised by an over protective (incredibly caring) mother and a father who wasn't always around but was there when it mattered. This was due to his job which allowed him to care for the three extremely demanding women, he has currently lost a majority of his hair and blames the women in his life for this. My parents are indescribable and I've grown to appreciate them more now then I ever did during my youth. They are as close to perfect as humanly possible and I adore them more then words could ever express! Along with my "perfect" parents came my older sister. Oh Natasha LaVonne! Growing up she was as zany as her name. She shaped my childhood in so many ways and I thank god every day for giving me such a strong role model. As I write more you will learn that my sister and I haven't always been close (now she's my only leg to stand on) and I will relate a lot of my current life obstacles to the HELL she put me through growing up!

At the ripe ol' age of 18 I decided I was over my life as I previously knew it. The summer after my senior year I loaded up a U-Haul, a Kia Sportage, and my high school sweet heart (who we will call Hammer), and we headed north. Bozeman Montana to be specific. I was going to college, determined to be a doctor, lawyer, professor, anything with promises of power, prestige, or money. I had huge dreams for a 100 pound girl! I was going to be something revolutionary! Being in college was amazing and I started my freshman year STRONG. I gave everything 110% including drinking, partying, socializing, meeting, greeting, grinning, grieving, fighting, crying, and yes even academia! As I gave 110% to everything certain things began to fall apart, mostly my three year relationship. You see, Hammer was giving 110% to just drinking, eating, sleeping, and come to find out a little blond tramp who will remain unnamed for she is not worth it. The relationship was stuck in the most destructive limbo imaginable. Fight, make up, drink, fight, make up, drink, fist fight, make up, drink, fist fight, meet the cops, make up, drink, and eventually complete and total DESTRUCTION! Even as the relationship was coming to an end I fought like hell to keep him. This by far was one of the hardest loses of my life, even compared to some deaths I've experience. I have to tell you I have always have bad taste in men and as you read more I will relate back to the life lessons I learned from the Sledge Hammer and those who came before and after him.

Heartbreak hurts but life goes on!! I realized I was an adorable, young, listless girl, with a smile on my face and the world at my feet. Newly single I thought I was the SHIT! HA HA HA if there is one thing college boys will do for you it's bring you down. I spent the next the two years of my life meeting men (who were essentially just boys reaching out for a mother figure), who I like but never enough to let them stay in my bed. Let me tell you, nothing makes a college boy mad like making him sleep on your couch every time he tries to stay the night. There was only one who didn't mind that couch and he stayed for a long time. He is now and will forever remain one of my best friends!! I fell in love with this man on a much deeper level, then appearance or personality, and although I didn't realize it at the time, mainly because he too was a dick. I had fallen in love with his soul!

Throughout the trials of my single years, I made the most of it by making incredible friends. Drewfus, Nicky Noodle, Rodgo, Japan, and Nestle (who will be referred to as Team Smash when group together) became my confidants, my partner's in crime, my sunshine on a cloudy day. This was one of the best times in my life. I lived everyday like 5 guys, a girl, and a pizza place, except my life wasn't portrayed in a horrible comedy. Out of these 5 men grew Smash. Smash is my alter ego. She's everything I'm not and everything I aspire to be! Smash is brave, assertive, messy, uncontrollable, and fierce. During this time in my life Smash would show up in an elaborately thought out costume (I was sooooo into theme parties), Boones Farm in hand, and six sheets to the wind due to the mass amount of tequila she had consumed prior to noon. Not a care in the world! Smash danced on tables, snuck into bars, sleep when the sun came up, and my favorite, she would always attempt to fight the biggest man in the room (which eventually yielded a black eye from the bastard's girlfriend)! At the end of the night my alter ego and I would end up safe and sound on the stinky futon of a Hawk's Ridge apartment, only to wake the next day and start it again. So public, readers, fans, and family I would like to introduce to you, the one and only Smash!

Introducing Team Smash
From Left to Right: Rodgo, Drewfus, Smash, and Nestle! In this picture we are at a bar in Livingston Montana, population 12, all of who were at the bar with us, celebrating Nestle's birthday!

Rodgo, Smash, Nicky Noodle

Japan